Thursday, May 21, 2009 it really so imp.??

So finally the day has come when things might change or will it. As much as i would like it not to change, deep down i know that things change and that it would change for good is what i am hoping for.

From being a complete nerd, anonymous, shy, small built, malnourished and i can continue...i have had quite a ride and many paths to tread. Its been a wonderful, exciting and eventful journey to say the least and when i look back, a very fulfilling one. This also takes me back in time when i was just about 11/12 and studying in a non decrepit school in town. Back then studying in a big school was a dream and i use to look with awe and admiration at students coming out of bus, wearing those really smart uniform. There was also a feeling of exasperation and envy for i was not the part of the elite group and was missing something big in life. Then suddenly as if it came from heaven like a meteorite that has shook the earth from nowhere, my dad asked me if i really want to join that school, like a oracle who knew all along what was in my mind. And before i knew it i was the part of so called elite group. To my surprise i mingled with them like water in milk and the feeling of being a part of privileged group completely vanished.
Then the next big event...cut to our 12 boards and i feared miserably, the only person who stared in disbelieve at my marks was...guess of course.

When i first landed in Delhi and it was like a revelation..everything seemed so big and hostile. Putting up in a flat on top floor with the weather showing no signs of mercy, no air conditioner, cooler the only saving grace and that too a shared with four friends, it seemed back then that having cold drinking water was a luxury, having a fridge would be a super luxury. We didn't dream of dating good looking Delhi girls but of drinking cold water.It actually seemed like a manna from heave only to wake up to reality and find that the nearest place to get water was a municipal established water cooler a kilometer away. If that was not enough the realization of the fact that we have to travel in the infamous Delhi buses know from everything but for safe driving.

But all this did not dampen our enthusiasm one bit and we made sure that we treaded every bit of Delhi never mind the hostilities. I must admit three years in Delhi changed me in more ways then i can think of.

That was then, crisscross to my Bschool days in Ahmadabad were life was king size. Two years went in a whisker, tried to do so many things but so many things left undone. When the end came too fast to soon, little did i realized that's it time to step in the so called real world.

Five years into reality and so much water has flown under the bridge. Somewhere between the time span i come across a grey strand of hair, just to realize that i am ageing but that feeling disappear quickly in the haze of the day. And now i have just turned 30..does it change anything...i have always believed in "18 till i die" philosophy but is it time to relook at old thoughts and give way to new set of rules? I don't know and the question has not found a answer. I guess with every new phases i have changed without realization and improvisation; and would be best if the process is natural and not forced upon. The point is why the hell should i care when the process has always been natural. As i had said earlier things change but there are something that never change and neither will i want it to change.



Rahul said...

happy b'day thing to change definitely is my habbit of forgetting...

As a "very" bollywood like dialogue from a hollywood movie goes ... some things never change but somethings do.


Putu said...

The journey of life I am describing similar with the movie which theme “treasure hunt” thought its interesting, such of interesting and enjoying, cause us unaware that a year has passed. Or suddenly realize that age is getting old. Journey of life is exciting, and because not rare happened that we have to "fight" with a lot of strength. There are wars againsts ourselves, there are wars against dishonesty, there are wars against repression, and many other wars. And last, of course, very challenging especialy because no one knows exactly what the future will be. Suddenly without adequate preparation it present in front of the eye.

Don’t know in which level of understanding your journey this far, but the more I dive, the more I know that life is a journey into oneself. Unlike treasure that we must search, opens the possibility to bring an invention. Treasure of life is in the learning process, and in the process we may find the changes, so once again in the learning process, not the final destination because journeys to find ourselves are a kind of journey that has no finish line.

Because of no end point, I should put the importance of living in this day, not just feast and the pleasure, but life is full of awareness and gratitude, while still given the time.
Cheers :D